TB12 Diet Diary: We tried to eat like Tom Brady, 43-year-old Super Bowl champion, for one week

As a Patriots fan, it was odd watching Tom Brady win his seventh Tremendous Bowl championship — his first exterior of New England. I am going to ceaselessly be thankful for Brady’s contributions to a dynasty, however nonetheless, it is all the time arduous to see an ex thrive.

Since Brady is 43 and nonetheless doing it, and one in every of my strongest character traits is a capability to punish myself at any given alternative, my bosses right here at CBS Sports activities thought it might be a good suggestion for me to embrace this private disaster. What higher technique to put together for the uncomfortable expertise of watching Brady in Tremendous Bowl LV than by residing the TB12 life-style for every week main as much as the sport?

For these unaware, TB12 is Brady’s life-style model constructed round his methodology of residing that has allowed him to seek out an unparalleled degree of sustained success on the NFL degree. Train, diet, costly pajamas … it is all a part of the Brady methodology. For this experiment, we will deal with the weight-reduction plan and pliability facets of the TB12 methodology, and I will be documenting my experiences alongside the way in which. 

And for the report: I used to dwell a considerably respectable life-style of my very own earlier than the world shut down final March. I used to work out often, try to eat properly and no less than make an off-the-cuff effort to faux that I deal with myself. Nonetheless, during the last yr or so, my model has primarily grow to be cigarettes, low-cost beer, frozen pizza, marathon online game classes and deteriorating hygiene. This venture from my bosses could very properly have be an intervention masked as a “work project.” This is the way it went.

The rules

There is a good probability you have already heard about Tom Brady’s absurd weight-reduction plan. The guidelines of issues he cannot/will not eat is seemingly longer than the issues he can/will. This is a glimpse on the madness from Brady’s private chef:

“No white sugar. No white flour. No MSG. I am going to use uncooked olive oil, however I by no means cook dinner with olive oil. I solely cook dinner with coconut oil. Fat like canola oil flip into trans fat. … I take advantage of Himalayan pink salt because the sodium. I by no means use iodized salt.

[Tom] does not eat nightshades, as a result of they don’t seem to be anti-inflammatory. So no tomatoes, peppers, mushrooms, or eggplants. Tomatoes trickle in every so often, however simply possibly as soon as a month. I am very cautious about tomatoes. They trigger irritation.

What else? No espresso. No caffeine. No fungus. No dairy.

The children eat fruit. Tom, not a lot. He’ll eat bananas in a smoothie. However in any other case, he prefers to not eat fruits.”

Yeah, so it is protected to say I did not comply with Brady’s weight-reduction plan precisely because the quarterback does — I might relatively have declined the project and be unemployed. Nonetheless, I did comply with the free define supplied by the TB12 web site. This is a primary define of the principles:

• 80% fruits, greens, entire grains, nuts, seeds, and legumes
• 20% protein (hen, purple meat, seafood)
• Eat till you are 75% full
• No dairy or nightshades
• Halve your physique weight in kilos and drink that many ounces of water (70 ounces for me every day)
• Max 2 cups of espresso / No caffeine after midday
• No meals inside 3 hours of going to mattress

Remaining entry: Day 7

My goodness, we made it. The weight-reduction plan journey has formally reached its finish and I lived to inform the story (when you need assistance envisioning me on this second, I’m Andy Dufresne standing within the rain after crawling by a sewer pipe in “The Shawshank Redemption.”) I am not going to say it was enjoyable or pleasurable, however I’ll admit it wasn’t fairly as troublesome or unbearable as I believed it could be. You possibly can nonetheless eat fairly properly on this life-style.

Admittedly, I did not actually get too artistic with the meals, as you’ll have observed by now. That is partially as a result of I’m an fool who’s fortunate to not burn down my home each time I attempt to make a meal, but additionally partially as a result of I knew I used to be by no means going to be lengthy for this lifestyle.

I did lastly take a break from hen on Sunday, deciding as an alternative to convey steak ideas into the combo. I seasoned with some rosemary and pink Himalayan salt after which paired with inexperienced beans and carrots. Not tremendous flashy, however a constant, dependable participant.

I want I might give you some grand takeaway in spite of everything of this, however actually all I’ve obtained is:

• I obtained actually gassy
• I nearly drowned from consuming a lot water

Once more, I solely did it for every week, and a variety of these diets want a bit extra time/dedication than that. That being mentioned, I actually do not feel like I might go on the market and win six Tremendous Bowls underneath heart, however possibly if I saved going a bit longer? 

Truthfully, although, you possibly can maintain your rings, supermodel spouse and a whole lot of tens of millions of {dollars}. None of that may make me blissful if I wasn’t allowed to smash a cheeseburger into my face or shove a complete pizza down my hatch every time I rattling properly please. Have you learnt how blissful I’ll be once I get to crack right into a bag of chips as I watch a sport tonight? I have been ready for this second for my complete life one entire week.

Additionally, let the report present that I gained one pound whereas doing this weight-reduction plan. Nailed it.

Day 1

As I discussed off the leap, this a drastic change from my pure way of life, so I needed to knock out a fast meals buying journey with a view to put together. I figured my native Dealer Joe’s can be the perfect play for lots of the natural meats and greens, after which I stuffed in a few of the blanks with a visit to Cease & Store. 

We have hit an annoying highway block already, as I figured yogurt & granola can be a great way to make the nuts and seeds bearable. Seems I am an fool who forgot that yogurt is dairy, and in addition an fool who did not understand that granola has a ton of sugar in it? God, this sucks already. I additionally determined to attempt some “inexperienced juice” just because it regarded wholesome and appeared like one thing I might be concerned in whereas on this weight-reduction plan. It tastes like rain water collected in a yard waste bag and I cannot be doing that ever once more.

I had a palm-sized portion of hen (cooked in coconut oil) for dinner together with some spinach, carrots and cucumbers for dinner. Not thrilling however, truthfully, it was strong. The larger concern is that I obtained hungry once more and kind of broke the principles on the primary day already, as you are not imagined to eat something inside three hours of going to mattress. I had celery and almonds as a late evening “deal with” to settle the starvation. You recognize your life is in a reasonably lame place when you need to really feel responsible about consuming celery and almonds. 

Additionally, that is a lot water to drink. I can not cease peeing.

Day 2

Okay, I am not going to lie … I had a banana for breakfast after which I fully skipped lunch as a result of I merely did not wish to eat any of this wholesome crap. That is how diets work, proper? It looks like I am on the way in which to shedding weight a technique or one other. 

The water factor remains to be completely killing me. I all the time knew that I by no means drank sufficient water all through the course of a day, however I really feel like I am drowning myself by consuming this a lot water. I am bloated and I really feel like I might legitimately be popped like a water balloon. 

I lastly obtained hungry sufficient to make one other one in every of these meals for dinner, and I positively overcompensated. I as soon as once more had some seasoned hen and an absolute boatload of greens. Like, manner too many greens. Have a look at how silly this seems to be: 

Yeah, about that entire “consuming till you are 75% full” factor … could have overshot the touchdown a bit bit.  I additionally dropped a bunch of carrots on the ground whereas taking them out of the fridge. And, sure, I did cheat by consuming two items of chocolate late final evening (OK, nice … it was 4 items of chocolate.) That is fully going off the rails already.

And, for the sake of full transparency, I’m farting. Rather a lot. Nonetheless attempting to determine if that is the weight-reduction plan’s fault, however it’s relatively regarding.  

Day 3

My bodily capabilities no less than appear to be considerably underneath management at present, which is a pleasant little shock! The meals are nonetheless enormously boring me — I had a banana and an avocado for lunch, then hen, inexperienced beans and corn for dinner. Additionally, I attempted the inexperienced juice once more simply to see if my physique could be higher outfitted to deal with it after two days … and nope. Nonetheless tastes like swamp soup.

Three days in and I’ve formally hit the purpose the place I’d flip a member of the family in to the police if it meant a cheeseburger and beer was ready for me on the opposite facet. Throw in a facet of fries and I’d admit to crimes I did not commit. 

Truthfully, one of many hardest elements of this factor just isn’t with the ability to maintain my fingers busy and snack/drink whereas anxiously watching sports activities at evening. Final evening I needed to accept chewing on ice cubes simply to maintain me from cracking right into a late evening stash.

Total, although, I really feel fairly first rate exterior of the irritability that comes with not with the ability to do regardless of the hell I would like, when the hell I would like. I really feel considerably completed for getting by a day with out breaking any guidelines. However I am already daydreaming in regards to the absolute havoc I’ll unleash on my physique as soon as this experiment is over.

Day 4

I feel I could be beginning to get the grasp of this, no less than when it comes to placing my meals collectively. For the primary time since beginning the weight-reduction plan, I really ate breakfast — three eggs over medium with spinach and a bit scorching sauce (no clue if scorching sauce is definitely allowed. If not, simply ignore that I mentioned that.) I used to be feeling fairly good about myself till Steven Cheah — a Barstool Sports activities worker/Buccaneers fan who’s been passionately dedicated to the TB12 weight-reduction plan because the begin of the playoffs — determined to tag me in a a lot better model of an identical meal. Go away, Steven. 

However, I continued. I skirted round lunch with the assistance of celery sticks and a few hummus, which did the job extra successfully than I believed it might. Dinner consisted of — you guessed it! — extra hen and greens. This time, we spiced up the hen with a bit lemon and paired it with kale, candy potatoes and corn. 

I promise I do not wish to maintain speaking about my farts, however they’ve returned with a vengeance and, as a trusted and moral journalist, I merely should report the information.

I do know diets sometimes take some time to supply any kind of significant outcomes, so it most likely will not come as a lot of a shock that I do not actually really feel any in a different way (apart from the delicate annoyance of getting to deal with myself like an precise grownup.) I’ve, nonetheless, misplaced 1.6 lbs from Monday-Friday. That might simply be from the energy I’ve burned whereas bitterly screaming on the TV each time a quick meals industrial comes on, although. 

Now that the weekend is right here, we attain an necessary juncture on this trial. Alcohol is not explicitly prohibited on the TB12 weight-reduction plan however, admittedly, my regular weekend routine of consuming seven-to-eight beers too many whereas not shifting an inch throughout a online game marathon most likely is not inspired by well being consultants. For the sake of the experiment, I’m going to do my finest to decide to a wholesome life-style — no less than close to what I put in my physique. You may need to pry the video video games from my chilly, lifeless (and thin) fingers. 

Day 5

As anticipated, the weekend is presenting some challenges. I cruised by many of the day on Friday with none concern — slept by breakfast … eggs and avocado for early lunch … then completed off my hen with some quinoa and black beans in a bowl. Please don’t decide the presentation (or my hitchhiker’s thumb), as a result of it was really kinda scrumptious:

Am I embarrassed in regards to the lack of shade in that meal? Yeah, possibly. Was I too lazy to make some spinach or throw some avocado within the bowl to offer it a bit life and never make it appear to be a pile of grime? After all I used to be.

Fortunately, I am a grasp of Photoshop so I may also help you visualize what it might appear to be if I wasn’t a lazy rubbish human. (I additionally determined to offer straight thumbs a attempt.)

Like I mentioned, getting by many of the day was kind of a breeze, however temptation got here out to play at evening — because it typically does. I used to be going to decide to doing the complete weekend with out booze, however that rapidly shifted to “possibly I am going to simply have one glass of wine with dinner … I deserve it.” I additionally determined to embrace my new life-style of being a totally boring and unbearable grownup by trying to do a puzzle (my first since childhood) on a Friday evening. As quickly as all of the items had been poured out onto the desk and I noticed how a lot work it was going to be, I made a decision I deserved a second glass of wine. Sue me. 

After a couple of hours and nearly no progress on the puzzle, I made a decision to placed on a film as an alternative. I used to be reflexively hit with an intense want to crack into the Dealer Joe’s movie show popcorn stashed in my kitchen, however I one way or the other, a way really managed to withstand. Am I a hero? Some are asking the query (the film I watched  was “The Little Issues” on HBO Max. It was forgettable.)

Day 6

Right this moment was a comparatively simple day. I had eggs, avocado and black espresso for breakfast, which was nice, but it surely prompted me to appreciate that I can nonetheless by no means actually take pleasure in avocados. I feel they seem to be a unhealthy meals and an overrated topping/ingredient, and the feel makes me shiver. So, after all, I made a decision to tweet this out:

Not surprisingly, that actually obtained underneath some individuals’s pores and skin. My mentions had been flooded with Avocado Defenders and avocado meme accounts, in order that leisure helped distract me from my starvation by lunch. Dinner wasn’t all that attention-grabbing — I had hen, quinoa and inexperienced beans — however I would like factors for driving previous a McDonald’s on my manner residence and never stopping, despite the fact that I thought of it. I’m the strongest man alive.

I did drink a bunch of beers whereas taking part in video video games all evening, although. Whoops.